Multi-tasking

Two weeks ago the kids and I went to the dentist. In hindsight I will admit I was perhaps a little ambitious when I made our appointments back in January, given that I made them for Kylie, Phillip, and me all back to back. As the day of our appointment approached I was a little apprehensive about how we would all fare in the dentist's office for what would probably be an hour and a half with a three month old baby.

It started out well. I volunteered to go first so I would be free to tend to Bella while the kids got their teeth cleaned. I no sooner got in the seat, laid back, and opened my mouth, when Bella started fussing. It was obvious that she was not going to be happy sitting quietly in her carseat while my teeth were being tended to. I got her out of her seat and laid back in the chair to let the hygienist do her work. The whole time she cleaned my teeth I was bouncing Bella on my tummy and/or laying her back against my knees. Sensing my total helplessness, as soon as the hygienist got to work Kylie and Phillip, like two little vultures hovering around fresh road-kill, took up positions on either side of me and started with a barrage of questions.

Kylie: "Mom who's going next. You said I could go next but
Phillip says he is, who's going next Mom, Mommmmm!"
Me: "Uuuuuu fan do dex" (the best I could muster with my mouth full of
dental instruments and two hands)
Phillip: "Momma, there's no place for me to sit, I want to sit, where
can I sit? Momma, answer me!"
Me: "Uuuuuu fan fit ad de boddum uf my hair."

You get the idea. The whole time my teeth were being cleaned and I was bouncing Bella (which, by the way, makes for an amazing bicep workout) Kylie and Phillip insisted on asking me questions. Which animal should they choose (Our dentist has little rubber animals that the kids get after their cleaning. He had them when I was their age and I can't believe they still make them. I suspect he bought several million of them in the early 70's and he's still trying to get rid of them.); how much longer would I be; what color toothbrush should they pick; how much longer would I be; they were hungry/tired/had to go to the bathroom; how much longer would I be...you get the idea. Pretty much all I could do was laugh, which I did. Becky, our hygienist, said at one point, "I wish I had a camera, I would love a picture of this!".

After my cleaning and inspection by the dentist (no cavities - yay!!) I went to see the receptionist to get the insurance forms so I could complete them while Kylie and Phillip were having their teeth cleaned. She looked at me holding Bella and giving her a bottle and said "your hands are full, you can't possibly fill these out now". I gave her my best "obviously you're not a mom" smile and, puffing up my chest, said "I can leap tall buildings in a single bound, feed hungry babies, quiet angry toddlers, referee sibling squabbles with a mouthful of dental instruments and complete your stinkin' insurance forms all at the same time - I am a Mother!" Okay, I didn't say it exactly like that, but I did assure her that completing the forms while giving a bottle to Bella was entirely possible.

As I returned to the room where Kylie and Phillip were I ran into our family dentist. He was laughing and said to me "Becky just said she couldn't believe how calm that mother was getting her teeth cleaned while bouncing an infant and talking to her two other children." He continued, "I just laughed and told her "That's Edie Mae, I've known her whole family since before she was born, she's been coming here since before she had teeth"". I love living in the town in which I was raised!

All in all it turned out pretty well. Bella fell asleep and I managed to complete three separate insurance forms while holding a sleeping infant, nobody had any cavities, Kylie left with a pink hippo and a pink toothbrush, Phillip left with a blue lion and a yellow toothbrush, and an hour and a half after we arrived I left with my sanity - oh, and a purple toothbrush!